Skip to content
October 31, 2012 / Dale Melchin

The Correct way to Deal with Frustrations

I realize life can be very challenging.  Bruce Lee said: “Do not pray for an easy life.  Pray for the strength to handle a hard life.”

The unfortunate thing is that so often we deal with frustrations in a way the numb the pain, but do nothing to strengthen ourselves against this.  I know I have struggled with this myself.  I used to do this all the time as an ex-gamer.  I would come home from the car wash  eat dinner, talk to people, and then lose myself in a video game for hours on end.  The issue was not the object, but the subject.  As a result of this habit, even though I was active at other times, I did a great disservice to myself in terms of my physique.  But I digress.

We have unhealthy ways of dealing with frustrations, you and I both know it if we are honest with ourselves.  It could be stress eating, smoking, drinking, drugs, TV, taking it out on those who mean the most to us and many other ways.  This is what we don’t want.  These and other previously mentioned items may benefit us in the short term because it dulls the pain, but it does nothing about the actual problem.  Our inner strength.

What should you do to develop “the strength to handle a hard life?”  As always, the answers are simple, but not easy.  If the frustration is an individual, if they are mature and can handle feedback, my personal recommendation is to have an honest and candid conversation with them about what they are doing to frustrate you.  If they reject your feedback and continue to be a problem accept them as part of the universe and minimize contact, but keep being gracious.   If you are compelled to work with them, simply tell them, look, for sake of harmony in the work place, let’s work together professionally, but otherwise, we leave each other alone.

If it is a circumstance, take steps to change that circumstance.  Use what influence you have to change things.

IF you cannot influence it, you need to work within yourself to accept the solution.

The final and perhaps it is the most important thing, is to deal with the cognitive fall out of your frustrations.  Acute, and cumulative stress.

The best and by far the most productive way to handle cumulative stress is to burn it up with physical activity.  Yes. You heard me.  Exercise.  Go for a walk, jog, bike ride, hit the punching back join a gym, dojo, whatever, but get into the habit of burning up that stress through regular exercise.  You will be able to find more creative ways to deal with the stressors in life if you do this.

Another great way to do this in tandem with physical activity is through meditation and internal observation.  Be aware of what happens when you are stressed or frustrated and how can you change those internal habits so that way you and the ones you love are protected from the fall out of your aggravations.

What are some healthy or unhealthy ways you deal with stress?  If unhealthy, what steps have you taken to correct it?  If healthy, what do you do and how do you recommend we get started?


Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )


Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: