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May 23, 2012 / Dale Melchin

Nature Versus Nurture

Its both.

Ok, we can all go home now.

No, not really, sit back down.

I have recently had some discussions with a friend of mine regarding this issue from an interesting perspective. While we seem to have similar ideas, we both come down differently on this issue. I am a self-determinist and he’s somewhat more deterministic.

As is common knowledge we are born we are dependent. We need others to care for us. The point of parental units is to get us to the point where we are independent and self sufficient beings who are interdependent with their environment.

Sadly, that system is dysfunctional at some level and we may get cast into role or scripts we don’t like on an unconscious level. We live with them often times without question until we have an encounter the causes us to shift our paradigms. We become conditioned.

We can in fact become so conditioned that we are self-destructive and we don’t take or don’t know how to take responsibility for our conditioning and some of us never escape this trap and live on a relatively low level of self-awareness.

However, despite our conditioning there is a part of use that yearns to be authentic and have a purpose of our own determination. So many times though we are hampered by fear or conditions in general. In fact it is written in the Proverbs “Hope deferred makes the heart sick, But desire fulfilled is a tree of life.”

My point in saying this is that while the effects of conditioning are true and evident and even epidemic, there is a greater power within the human spirit called choice.

We can choose how to respond to life despite our circumstances. At some level, we all have a choice to respond to what happens to us in a way that is constructive and will help us achieve our goals, or that will set us on a self-destructive path. I’ve read too many authors and seen too much evidence that despite our circumstances we can still choose live in a way that is authentic and is beyond conditioning and conditions because of a Greater Reality that exists beyond the 5 senses.

That is the point of every enduring tradition. Whether you are working on becoming a Saint, a Buddha, an Immortal, or even from a secular perspective, becoming self-actualized that is the point. We come to a place where we choose how the conditioning affects us, and we systematically untie the knots of our lives and let loose on the dance hall of human existence as it were.

To wrap up this up: We grow up subject to conditions, we can either choose to be slaves to that conditioning, or we can consciously choose to transcend and utilize that conditioning to our advantage… or we can stay stuck. Regardless of how you come the decision… it is ultimately a decision we all make either all at once, or overtime, or some combination of those.

What would overcoming your conditioning make possible for you?

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