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March 19, 2012 / Dale Melchin

Independence on the Dependence-Interdependence Continuum Part 3

Have you ever met someone who was staunchly independent?  They did they’re won’t thing, thought their own thoughts, nothing seemed to bother them and they were phenomenally successful?  If so what were they like?

More than likely the person you ran into was an independent person. According to “independent” is when one is not influenced or controlled by others in matters of opinion, conduct, etc.; thinking or acting for one’s self: An independent thinker.

Body:  There are 3 traits of truly independent people that I want to touch upon today and at least begin the journey from dependence to interdependence.

Independent people are proactive.

Again, I owe much, much credit to Stephen Covey and his book for a lot of my current thought patterns.  Proactivity means in a short definition that one controls what one can control, and they are vigilant for things they can’t control, but they don’t let them bother them.  They control, what is controllable from their stand point.   The things that are control able are character, attitude, thought, and behavior.  They do this by busting bad habits and replacing them with good ones so that success comes to them as a function of who they are and what they do.

Independent people have a vision and they are focused on bringing it into reality.

In layman’s terms, they have goals and are focused on them and organize their resources to the fulfillment of those goals and work around the things that obstruct those goals.  They avoid activities and people that are detrimental to the mission or if necessary, put those people in their place.

 They build the possibility of difficulty or defeat into the action plan and use it as a blueprint for further success.

Yes you heard me.  Defeat is a possibility.  Difficulty is definite.  Failure is when you quit when you could’ve made it if you had just gotten back up.  Defeat is when another force or lack of knowledge cause issues in achieving your goals.  While you don’t watch the failure paths, you make sure you are aware of them and you avoid them.  The beautiful thing about being human and self-aware, is that we can learn from defeats and mistakes and achieve success as long as we are breathing.  We don’t have to learn, learned helplessness.

Independence is always superior to dependence.  It’s a trait that you can develop just like strength or stamina, and you can start today by being responsible for your life.  Begin reading and applying the success literature of your choice and choose to be happy!


Have you ever met a truly independent person?  If so what were they like?  Did you want to be like them?  How could you find ways to emulate your favorite independent hero?


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